Burnout (Part 2)
Photo by Antonio Di Ferdinando on Unsplash
This blog post is a continuation of my previous post on burnout, which you can read here.
Oftentimes, clients come to therapy having already acknowledged that they’re burnt out. You likely are already aware of the common self care practices to address burn out, such as exercising, sleeping, and engaging in hobbies. You may also be in a situation where it’s not possible to directly change or remove the stressors contributing to burn out (i.e. you’re a new parent, you’re not in a position where you can quit your job, etc).
When clients are in this position, I often like to see it as an opportunity to take a deeper look at your inner world and get to know the “players” contributing to burn out. This can start with noticing cues which commonly show up. Examples of cues might be feelings (stress, worry, fear), thoughts (I’m at capacity but I should keep working), or physical sensations (pain, tension, fatigue). When these cues arise, what do you find yourself turning to?
Some examples may be:
1. A tendency to people please - “As long as my boss is happy with my work, everything is okay.”
2. A tendency to self criticize - “Why do I suck? Why am I so lazy?”
3. A tendency to pursue perfection - "What I’m producing isn’t good enough; I’ll keep working hard until it is.”
4. A tendency to believe you’re an imposter - “What am I doing here? Maybe I’m not even qualified for this role. I’ll keep working so no one finds out I don’t know what I’m doing.”
When we identify the tendencies we turn to when we experience an uncomfortable thought, sensation, or feeling, we start to understand that people-pleasing, self-criticism, and perfectionism shield and comfort us from pain. We may see these behaviors as both contributing to further burnout AND behaviors we appreciate for the protective roles they take on.
Seeing the function of these "players" is the beginning of peeling back the layers of what we are protecting ourselves from. Then, whether it be a core fear or an overwhelming experience, we can work with it, unburden an expired belief, and increase our capacity for restoration, ease, and rest.