What “Turning Red” Reveals About Asian Mental Health
Disney’s first Asian-led animated movie “Turning Red” beautifully captures the life of Mei Lee, a 13-year-old Chinese Canadian adolescent. Mei struggles to embrace her independence and pursue her interests, while also honoring and respecting her mother’s wishes for her life. As an Asian American child of immigrants, I found myself relating to Mei and the conflicts she faced. As an Asian American therapist, I found myself observing some key themes regarding mental health within the Asian community:
Intergenerational conflict, immigration, and familial expectations can make it difficult to cultivate our sense of self. In the opening scene, Mei narrates, “Be careful. Honoring your parents sounds great, but if you take it too far, well, you might forget to honor yourself.” Similar to Mei, you might experience conflict with your parents when you express your opinions. You hear responses such as, “That’s so American of you.” You might be reminded of the sacrifice your parents made by immigrating to America, so you feel you should express appreciation by meeting familial expectations. Perhaps you’re so used to adhering to the expectations of your family, that you’ve never considered your own hopes and desires for your life. “Turning Red” highlights and normalizes these challenging dynamics that many Asian children of immigrants face.
We can heal intergenerational wounds. At the end of the movie, we see a younger version of Mei’s mother (Ming) saying through tears, “It’s all my fault… I’m so sick of being perfect… I’m never gonna be good enough for her [my mother].” Mei is able to relate to the younger version of her mom, speaking aloud words of comfort. Similar to Mei and Ming, you may also experience the insurmountable pressure to be perfect and “good enough” for your parents. Although these pressures and expectations are likely passed down from previous generations, Mei shows us that it is possible to heal these intergenerational wounds.
Big feelings are not bad; they make us more human and whole. When Mei initially turns into her red panda, she feels afraid and is told to “not let the red panda out, or it will be harder to control.” Similarly, you may have been taught that if you aren’t able to properly hide or control your emotions, they will cause destruction. However, I love how Mei’s ancestors intended for the red panda to be a generational blessing, a powerful way to harness emotions in order to protect her family. As Mei gets more comfortable with her red panda, she begins to discover and embrace new parts of herself that she hasn’t before. She experiences more freedom and confidence to express her feelings and opinions. Perhaps instead of seeing our feelings as inconvenient or something to hide, we can see them as trustworthy sources of information which can be harnessed for good.
As I’ve reflected on “Turning Red” with my clients, some questions we’ve explored are:
How can you begin to honor different parts of yourself, including the part that wishes to honor your parents?
If you could speak to your younger self, what would you say? What did your 13-year-old self need to hear?
How might we approach some of your big feelings with curiosity? What information might they give us?
If you’d like to see if this approach to therapy can work for you, set up an initial call with us. We are looking forward to hearing from you!