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Therapy can be incredibly healing because we feel heard and seen. Our pain is witnessed, not dismissed. The therapeutic space is held with compassion, not with judgment. We are held with care, not with indifference. Although these qualities may seem simple, a therapist can only effectively implement these skills if they are culturally sensitive. As some of you may relate, it can take so much from us to feel safe and comfortable enough to open up to someone. Some of us may have attempted to share vulnerable feelings and memories with others, which turned out to be a negative experience.

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The unexpected death and sudden loss of a loved one due to an accident, suicide, forced separation, or war ask the bereaved to confront two tasks: healing from trauma and metabolizing grief. In the face of trauma-related grief, the task of healing from trauma involves reprocessing memories.

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Relationship conflict, family-of-origin issues, and communication challenges are some of the most common reasons people seek Trauma Therapy with Therapy on Fig. Clients often ask, "Does everything really tie back to my childhood?" While not all issues are necessarily rooted solely in one's childhood, past traumas, and stressful events can impact one's present-day relationships. Trauma Therapy in Los Angeles, CA can be a safe space to gain clarity around how these past traumas might be impacting your relationships. While answering the question, "How did we get here?"

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Recent trauma research has indicated a link between a history of trauma and being diagnosed with an anxiety or adjustment disorder in adulthood. Instead of seeing anxiety disorders as a biological defect in the brain, we are learning that these responses may be heightened. This is due to an overactive nervous system. One that appropriately matched the stressors of our external environment growing up. Even if the trauma does not lead to a complete PTSD diagnosis, we can still be left with the lingering effects of trauma. This can manifest as anxiety symptoms like hypervigilance, excessive worry, panic attacks, and restlessness. If you're experiencing these symptoms, seeking help from a trauma therapist who specializes in Trauma Therapy in Los Angeles, CA can provide you with the support and tools you need to heal and manage your trauma-related anxiety.

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As a deep feeler and thinker, you find yourself overthinking and worrying about being a burden, often people-pleasing, in hopes of preventing that. These fears aren’t new; maybe they have become constant companions from growing up hearing things like, “Just get over it” and “Stop being so sensitive.” Finding yourself stuck in these cycles has brought resentment and feeling at odds with yourself. 

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Oftentimes, clients come to therapy with a general awareness of their pain points, triggers, and tendencies/patterns. In the early stages of therapy, I often will conduct an informal assessment to determine if a new client’s observations of themselves may align with traits of a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP). In this blog, from us here at Therapy on Fig, we will explore the idea of an HSP and how HSP therapy in Los Angeles, CA can help.

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After exploring podcasts, books, talking with friends, and past therapy experiences, you're realizing that being highly sensitive and an empath is a big part of who you are. It affects almost every part of your life. You may have picked a profession that aligns with your ability to pick up on subtleties and nuances, such as a therapist. You could also find yourself in a highly driven, high-pressure tech company where high performance and its optics are prioritized and valued. In both situations, you've learned how to access and leverage your natural strengths in different places. It's been tough, and you're looking for an HSP therapist who understands what it's like to be highly sensitive and can help you even more. This is where Therapy for Empaths and HSPs in Los Angeles, CA with Therapy on Fig can help you!

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We don’t discuss it as often as we should, but friendships can be challenging. Especially for those who identify as highly sensitive persons (HSPs), friendship dynamics can sometimes feel stressful and overwhelming. HSPs have a high level of depth and attunement to our emotions and the emotions of others, are often sensitive to our environment and sensory output, and may become overstimulated more easily.

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Many people come to therapy with an awareness that intergenerational trauma exists in their family. I often hear clients express a desire to heal and move forward from intergenerational trauma by trailblazing a new path. This "new path" might look like:

1. Considering a career change or pursuing past interests/passions.

2. Re-imagining a new life for the next generation, such as parenting your children or relating to your nieces and nephews differently.

3. Exploring identity development/formation and figuring out, "Who or what do I want to be?"

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Even though we may intend to show up completely authentically with our therapist (and we may wholeheartedly believe we are doing this), our protectors might be taking up more space than we realize. The part of us that seeks out therapy may not be the one that sits in the therapy room. The part of us who really needs to be heard may not be the one doing the talking. It's unrealistic to assume that our protective parts would suddenly relinquish control, even if we genuinely connect with our therapist.

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Religious trauma, much like experiencing physical and sexual abuse or a severe accident can produce the same effects. Feelings of isolation, shame, guilt, anger, and dissociation are common. Direct and indirect messages from beliefs, religious leaders, and the spiritual community can become rigid, shaming, and fear-mongering. So it makes sense to find yourself desperate for control to make yourself "good" and avoid punishment. 

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Self-pathologizing is the act of diagnosing or labeling oneself with mental health issues without proper evaluation. It assumes some deficit in the individual without considering nuances of their past experiences or environmental factors. It makes sense that it would feel validating to find a label that fits our symptoms, as our brains love categorization and fitting us into neat boxes. However, it can also lead us down a path of self-limitation and unnecessary distress.

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Intellectualization is a subtle protective part of us that can arise inside and outside the therapy room. It can feel extremely illuminating and empowering to gain an intellectual understanding of our inner world. With so much more emphasis on self-help and therapy in the greater discourse, it’s become easy to believe we are “doing the work” by thinking, learning, and understanding. There is a crucial caveat: in pursuing intellectual insight, we may unknowingly distancing ourselves from emotion. 

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EMDR therapy can benefit what is often referred to as Big "T" trauma, what we may typically think of as traumatic (e.g., car accident, childhood abuse, domestic violence, sexual assault, combat, etc.), and Little "t," trauma, which may look like experiencing neglect from caregivers, being bullied, loss of significant relationships, and other relational trauma. EMDR can support in bringing healing to both and help you feel more grounded in your life, reducing issues such as anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem.

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You may have grown up in a culture where you were told that anything fun was a waste of time. As an Asian American child of immigrants, I was often told that play was allowed only after being productive. Play was viewed only as a luxury or reward, and engaging in play any other time was considered a waste. As a millennial, I’ve half-joked with friends that our generation feels pressure to monetize our hobbies for them to feel worthwhile.

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We all know conflict is an unavoidable and even healthy part of intimate relationships. Standing up for ourselves fosters self-esteem, asking for what we need improves self-efficacy and self-confidence, and learning to tolerate discomfort while speaking our truth encourages a braver and more honest connection with our partner. However, conflict provides another, deeper benefit: it reveals our subconscious stories (i.e., beliefs) that we were previously unaware of.

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Because shame can feel so overwhelming, our first instinct might be to avoid it. Maybe you react angrily to perceived criticism or rejection, fearing your shame will be revealed. Perhaps you shut down and withdraw yourself from the person bringing out your shame. Whatever the response, these are examples of protective mechanisms that help to shield us from our shame. However, perceiving shame as just one aspect of our emotional experience is helpful.

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In and outside the family, when well-behaved and mature are reinforced over time by well-meaning adults through praise and/or a lack of discipline, it can cause children to associate their value with being “easy” and, by extension, not having needs and being self-sufficient.

This can bring a sense of not feeling free to engage in carefree play, heightened anxiety around making mistakes, and struggles with vulnerability.

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